What do you think courage means?

It means you don't let people fuck with you, your family, or your friends.


The other day I was talking to someone about creepy phone calls. We were saying how weird people would call our places of employment and ask weird questions. She used to work as a manager of denny's a long, long, long time ago. This dude would call once a week around 3 or 4 o'clock in the morning and ask whoever answered the phone,"What kind of pantyhose do you have on?"

I used to have a job that required that I had to wear a name tag. People would just say the weirdest things. So, I put a fake name on my name tag; Marilyn. That was my name for over a year. There was this one guy who always flirted with me and even called where I worked and asked to speak to Marilyn. Creepy.

Anyways, there is this guy that calls me periodically. It's never from the same number. I mean, I know who the person is and all, but I have no way of contacting them, if that makes sense. So, he calls and tells me how he is in love with me and how he thinks about me all the time. Weird, right? He also has a girlfriend. It really makes me feel awkward and uncomfortable. And the calls always come at weird hours, too. It could be the time zone differences, but still. Guys are so stupid.

I haven't been on here in forever. It makes me sad. This whole blog was basically one huge run on sentence. Today I was watching Tyra and they were talking about how UCLA did a study about people who keep diaries. The study showed people who keep diaries are more happy than those who don't. Does this blog count as a diary? I hope. It does relieve some stress to just vent on here. It does make me laugh that people actually get on here and read the stupid shit I say. So funny.

Anyways, I'm going to bed now.
I love you.

What do you think about when you can't fall asleep?

That seems to be when my thoughts go in all these crazy directions.
I usually think about stuff I rather not, like dying and other dumb shit.
I usually write stuff when I'm trying to sleep.
So, sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night, write something down, and then re-read it the next morning.
It can be so awkward sometimes.
Most of the time it's funny.
I really love sleeping.
It's one of my favorite past times, but I feel like I'm missing out on so much stuff while I'm sleeping.
For some reason, whenever I take a picture of myself, it always looks like I just snorted a line of coke.
Classy, right?
You can pay for school, but you can't buy class.

What do you think about people who take advantage of others?

It's really shitty.

I'm been listening to this one band lately. I can't even remotely start to explain how much I love them. They make me feel so good when I listen to them.

I feel like I'm going through this really awkward stage right now, but I'm loving every single second of it. I just feel like wearing all black all the time. Not that I'm down or anything. I just think I'm most confident in black. So many great people wore all black. Think about it, Johnny Cash, Joan Jett. I'm sure there are more.

I really like bagels. I haven't had a bagel in forever. I love the bagels at panera. They have the best hazelnut cream cheese ever. So delicious. I'm going to bed now.

What do you think about ghosts?

I have way too many opinions to put into one little blog.
I know there are things out there that can't be explained.
I know I've had things happen to me.
I'll leave it at that.

I'm not a fan of concept albums.
But since we're talking about ghosts, I recommend Armor For Sleep's What To Do When You Are Dead.
It's a unusual album and I really like it.
Armor For Sleep have always been one of my favorite bands.
I found out a couple of days ago that they have decided to call it quits.

I don't really like to have other people's writings on here but I really liked the concept of this thought.

to me a song is like a snapshot of a moment, real or made-up, and the band that takes that snapshot is like a camera. i was really happy and proud of the pictures that came out of our little camera, but i would have much rather put in on a shelf for me and all of us to look at with fond memories than to feel this intense need to make it take high-def panoramic mosaics when maybe it was constructed to handle polaroid film. it's as simple as that.

Anyways, that's all.
Goodnight.

Hello October.

So, I kind of took a month off from here.
I live a busy life.



When I was little, my older cousins thought I looked a lot like that girl.
I wonder what she is up to now a days?...
Any clue?


I just washed and conditioned my hair.
Feels good.

I pulled a muscle in my neck.
It hurts.

I know I'm behind on this thing.
So, I'm going to continue to crank them out like a factory.

What do you think of someone who has bad manners?

They are rude.
Girls don't like guys like that.


Not that I give a shit, but I think it's really cute when people copy my myspace page.
Originality isn't cheap these days.
I mean, you can only copy someone so much.
You can get the same hair cut as me, buy the same shoes or shirt, wear your makeup the same, but you will never have the same morals, values, opinions, thoughts, or feelings as me.
It's like the saying goes, you can try on my clothes, but you'll never fit in my shoes.

What do you think the world will be like when you are a grown up?

Have you seen the movie idocracy?
Hahaha.
I don't know.
I hope things will be better.
All I can do is be the change I hope to see in the world.

If I Were A Boy


I am absolutely in love with this music video.
Such a simple concept, but it's cool.
I think Beyonce is the most beautiful women ever.
Seriously.

What do you think should be done to keep people who are under the influence of alcohol off the road?

People should call taxis.

I need to moisturize my face asap.

New Glamour Kills line is sick.
Feels like they went with more basic pieces rather than weird, eccentric, uncommon pieces.
I love that they made stuff that is every day.
Casual.

Okay.
I'll catch up with all of this later!

What do you think about people who are inconsiderate of others?

They are jerks.

I like to write the letter j in cursive.

My friend's band got signed to Rise Records.
Congrats.

What do you think about having set rules for people to follow?

I think rules in fashion are meant to be broken.
MAC cosmetics launched their new line recently.
It is kind of gothic meets pin up.
It has black lipstick, which kind of has a bad stigma, but it looks cool.

http://www.maccosmetics.com/whats_new/collection.tmpl?CATEGORY_ID=CAT1772

I love it!

What do you think about people polluting the environment?

People should do everything in their own power to stop pollution.


My mom and I are talking about Michael Jackson. We're talking about his case where he was charged with molestation. Did he do it or not? I honestly have no idea. It's really none off my business.

I love Macaulay Culkin.
We just had a talk about him and how his childhood is a lot like Michael Jackson;s.

What do you think about the amount of violence on T.V.?

It is bad and gives children the wrong idea.

What do you think your friends say to each other when you're not around?

Oh Gosh.
It does not feel like this movie is 5 years old.
The best part of this movie, is that girls really do act like this!

What do you think the world needs now?

What do you think someone your age can do to help reduce the amount of pollution in our environment?

Haha, wow. This hits really close to home with me. I am currently the president of the earth club at my school.
For people my age, there are many small things people can do to create a big change.
Walking and/or riding a bike
Recycling
Turning off the lights
Unplugging electronics not currently being used
Properly disposing trash
Volunteering to clean up different areas, such as a local creek or river bank
Etc.


Right now I am currently working on a project to get recycling bins in every classroom in the school.
It's a really amazing club.


If you would like to get involved, visit dosomething.org

What do you think of 3D movies?

They are okay I suppose.


My school always does blood drives.
I volunteered to donate, but they told me that I didn't weigh enough.
Bummer.

I think I'm really sick and I would like to get some blood work done to find out if my suspicions are correct.
I'm just afraid that if I am sick, and have to be put into the hospital, my vegetarianism is going to be questioned.
I've been thinking really intensely about this for the last 4 days.
Am I really willing to give up my 4 years of hard work for my health?
It really sucks.
I am torn.


I'm supposed to go to simon kenton high school tomorrow for a soccer game.
Maybe I will stop by my mom's work and have them see what's up.

My whole body hurts. I'm too young for this. Help me.

If your friend told you of a secret plan to run away from home, what would you do and why?

I don't know.


I have something I have to do every single day this week.
On Thursday, I'm doing a cancer walk with my friends from work.
We're going to dress 80's, haha.
I need to find my adidas headband.
I'm really excited.
I'm going to bed now.
Goodnight!

If you had to describe yourself as a colour, which would you choose?

I would pick black because it's my favorite color, the only color I wear, and it's classy.
You can never ever own too much black.
I mean, as long as it's tasteful.
Everyone always laughs so hard when they see m closet.
80% is black.

I've been really sick this weekend.
Friday night I almost went to the emergency room.
I had my mom use the symptom checker on webmd, which is my favorite website.
It gave me a list of 20 different things I could have.
My mom didn't agree with any of them and told me she thought my blood sugar was low and made me name everything I ate that day.
Who knows what is wrong with me?
I feel horrible.

If you could break the Guiness Book of Records it would be for?

Something cool I hope. I remember reading those books in grade school. I personally liked the freak section with the wolf people and the world's fattest baby.

I worked tonight. My friend and I were recalling times from middle school. We were laughing so hard.

If you could participate in an Olympic event, which one would you choose and why?

I don't know.
I would just be Michael Phelp's girlfriend and his personal cheerleader.

I suddenly just felt like I was going to throw up.

So, anyways, I went out tonight with some friends. I was dressed really nice and stuff. This random girl came up to me and was like "Excuse me, you look really familiar. Where do I know you from?" As weird as it sounds, it happens to me all the time. I'm not quite sure what to say back or why they are even asking me. I mean really, it's sooo awkward. I'm nothing special. Don't focus all over your attention on me. I may look important, but it's because I want to be taken seriously.

I also saw this girl tonight. Every time she sees me, she runs and hides. It's really mature. Plus, she loves to start shit. I had this really good idea to make her crazy. But I have to be more mature and decided to not do it. Maybe next time.

If you owned a store, what would you do to discourage people from stealing from you?

I would grab them by the pony tail, swing them around, throw them on the ground, and the curbstomp them.
:)


I thought about you today.
I was kind of upset, but then I thought of this song....

How was I supposed to know?

All Time Low - Damned If I Do Ya (Damned If I Don't)


As more and more time passes, I find that I hate what this band has become. I love them so much, don't get me wrong, but people give Alex too much credit. I personally don't like him. It's nothing personal, but at the same time, it's those brown eyes I'm a sucker for. I just feel like this band is something I've carried around in my back pocket for the last couple of years. Before Alex was ever good looking, sorry to break your little heart. I'm trying to be happy for them. They deserve everything they achieve. I just don't want them to become the next fall out boy. I used to look up to Andy Hurley so much. You don't see a lot of vegan and straight edge people as you used to. Being a vegetarian and as close to edge you can get without claiming, I admired him. Over the summer I met him and was amazed at how much of an asshole he was. I just don't want this to happen to All Time Low. I sometimes feel ashamed to say I am a fan. I honestly I hate thier fans. There are a few good ones, don't get me wrong. But the majority of them are annoying and obsessive.

At the top of this blog was their 2nd video for their new album and I thought it was completely awful from the plot to the set. I will give credit to whoever edited it.

If there were no rules, what do you think would happen?

The world would be crazy!


So, a while back, probably about a year and a half ago, I went to a local show. This really cute boy kept looking and me and smiling. He approached me and asked me to hold his jacket for him. He ended up putting his number in my phone and texted himself so he could have my number. We talked for a while and then he fell off of the face of the earth. I recently have been getting into facebook more and decided to search him. I found him and then searched for him on myspace. I sound like such a creep. Anyways, he became really not that cute and he is engaged. Hahahahaha. I love weird things like this.

If it were your job to decide what shows can be on t.v., how would you choose?

I would have to say that I wish about 80 percent of the shows that are on, are stupid.

I hardly ever watch tv, but when I have time:
It's On With Alexa Chung
The Tyra Show
America's Next Top Model
Project Runway
Greek
Secret Life of the American Teenager
Jon and Kate Plus 8 (I'm team kate, btw.)
Any show that has to do with decorating cakes, mostly the one with the italian family
Dateline NBC
20/20

If you were lost in the woods and it got dark, what would you do?

I would probably have a panic attack.

America's Next Top Model started this week.
I already have my girl picked to win.
Anyone want to place bets?

I'm supposed to be dying my hair soon.
I have the prettiest hair color ever picked out.
I think I'm going to wait until the middle of October to dye it.
One of the girl's I work with is going to do it!
Sweet!

If you were five years older you would...

In 5 years, I'll be 22. That really freaks me out. I really like my age. It's classic. I feel like this is age everyone wants to be, except me. I do wish I was older, but it really doesn't matter any more.

I just love sixteen candles with molly ringwald.

If you were a mouse in your house in the evening, what would you see your family doing?

Is this question for real?
I put on a pair of mickey mouse club ears today.
They were cute.


I work allllll the time.
I mean it's only 3 days a week, but it feels like forever.

I love Justin Bieber's song One Time.
It's so catchy.

If you were principal of this school, what would you do?

I would hope to be an authority figure that people respect and don't treat like shit.

I seriously have had no time to do anything.

My allergies are so bad right now.

I can't breath.

If you could do whatever you wanted to right now, what would you do?

I really want to get my septum pierced.

Anyways, I wish I had the maturity of Gwen Stefani.
I hope it comes with age.
Listen to exgirlfriend and then listen to cool.
They are too completely different concepts.
She's crazy!

If you received any sum of money as a gift, what would you do with it?

I would have my dad invest it for me.

I really want to learn how to square dance.
It's really funny.

I went to the emergency room today.
I can't hear.

If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?

I love the city of angels.

If you could give any gift in the world, what would you give and to whom?

This question is so dumb.

If you could only take 3 people with you on a trip around the world, who would you take and why?

My mom.
My dad.
My brother.

If you could have been someone in history, who would you have been?

I really like being myself...
But if I could fill anyone's shoe's for a day, I'd pick Marilyn Monroe.
She's so beautiful.
Today was the first time in forever that I actually felt happy. Nothing exciting or unusual happened. I think it's because you weren't in my thoughts. This is the first day were I could give a shit less about you. I'm finally over you. 100%. You know what really confuses me about you? I can't write about you. I love writing. I write about people all the time. I have people who are my muses. I used to have a whole drawer filled with stuff I wrote on this particular individual, hundreds of papers. It all came so easy. When I think about you, when I put the pen to the paper, I've got nothing. I guess you really didn't have that big of an impact on me and it makes me laugh so hard. Seriously.

I got to hang out with a close acquaintance the other night. I hadn't seen them in a while. I won't lie, I had a little crush on him. We were talking and he said he had a girlfriend. It kind of sucks, but I'd rather be friends than nothing. You know? Somehow we got onto the subject of prom. He was telling me about how he took his best friend to prom and how he was secretly in love with her. Then they went to an after party and she ditched him for her lame boyfriend. I think she's missing out. He's such a lovely man. Anyone would be lucky to have him. He's such a sweetheart.


The other night I had a dream about Shawn Harris. It was so strange. It sucks so bad that my favorite band had to break up. I seriously loved them so much. You don't see a lot of bands who go against the grain and what's popular. That's what I liked about them. I live on the other side of the country and was not able to attend all of the going away shows in the bay. If you didn't know, my car is named after him.

What would you do if you saw a friend cheating--report it, confront the friend, nothing--and why?

Once a cheater, always a cheater.
I had no time to update last night.
That means 2 blogs in one day.

What would you say if someone told you it was all right to steal from a large department store?

Shoplifting is never right.
I always have to watch people at my work.
I catch them all the time.
I thinking about writing a blog about fashion when I have more time.
It should be interesting.
Right now I'm dying.
Goodnight.

What would you do if you wanted to be friends with someone who spoke no English?

Everyone speaks body language.
Holla.


So, lately I've been having a huge crush on Macaulay Culkin. I find him so interesting to look at, probably because he's everything I'm not into. I usually find brown hair, brown eyes attractive. Anyways, he had such a weird childhood. Look into it. I really want to read his book but no libraries have it. I don't want to buy it unless it's really good.Okay. That's all.

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

What would you do if you found a magic wand?

Call Micheal and tell him.
Then do stuff that harry potter does.

What would you do if you had four math problems marked wrong that were right?

I would show the teacher and have her fix the problems.

What would you do if a friend comes to your house and his/her mom doesn't know he's/she's there?

That question was completely stupid.



I had the worst day ever today.
I ended up balling my eyes out to a couple people.
I felt so dumb to be crying at work, but after I was done, I was over it.
Sometimes you need a really good cry every once and a while.

I just have so much stress and anxiety.
I don't know how to handle it.
I just bottle it up.
I should probably go see a therapist or something.


I'm trying to find information on online schooling.
I'm already done with all the shit that goes along with high school.


My friend is supposed to come home in a couple of weeks.
I'm excited.

What would you do if an hour before the party you remember you don't have a gift?

Isn't that what gift cards are for?




That's my best friend. She so beautiful. I'm so proud of how her pictures turned out.

My contacts feel weird.

Have you ever taken a shower with anyone before?
Not naked, :)

You just drank 52 shots, what would you be doing?
I don't drink. I'm making fun of the person who just drank 52 shots.

Are you single/..​taken/..​crushing?
Hung up, the ball is in their court.

Last person you talked to on the phone?
Melanie about these situations.

What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?
Sociology.

Think back to the last person you kissed, how many times have you cried in front of them?
I cried in front of them a lot. The last time I saw them I was crying.

Have you ever laughed at something that wasn't meant to be funny?
Yes, oops.

Anything good happening tomorrow?
Not sure, possibly.

Want something you can't have?
Always, more particularly, someone.

Would your parents be mad if you came home drunk?
I don't drink.

Where is the last person you kissed?
His apartment? I don't know.

Who were you with last night?
My Family

Have you ever had four people of the opposite sex have a crush on you at one time?
No one crushes on me.

Do you think you have made anyone happy recently?
I hope.

Do you open up to people easily?
No, I don't trust anyone.

Have you ever kissed anyone whose name started with N?
One of my boyfriends.

Are you currently frustrated with anyone or anything?
Yes. Multiple people, including myself.

Is your room ever clean?
When I have time to clean it, yes. It's really organized.

Do you like to cuddle?
No.

Do you cry easily?
I try not to. It's something I don't do in front of people often. But, I usually cry right before I go to sleep. Charming, right?

Ever cried while on the phone with someone?
Yes, Seth Steele. I call him at weird hours of the night and tell him all my problems while he tells me everything is going to be okay. He is a really good friend.

Do you take walks often?
Yes, I like to break my new shoes in.

what was the last thing you drank?
Water.

Have you ever broken anyone's heart?
No.

Was your last kiss drunk or sober?
Sober.

Do you think you can last in a relationship for six months?
I tend to be serious with my relationships,

Do you remember the first time you kissed the last person you kissed?
Yes, while watching step brothers.

Has anyone said they love you in the last week?
Yes.

Would you rather drink coffee or tea?
Sweet tea from McDonald's.

Think to the last person you kissed, have you ever kissed them on your bed?
I really wish you'd stop asking questions about this person.

Have you ever gone camping?
Yes.

Do you get nervous with public speaking?
I have stage fright.

Do you curse in front of your parents?
Yes.

Do you get in trouble?
No.

Do you want to grow old with someone or be single forever?
I don't want to be a crazy cat lady.

Wearing any bracelets?
Kody and I's best friend lion bracelet, and JAGK.

What are you wearing right now?
Hugh Heffner pajamas.

Do you want to start over with anyone?
Yes.

Ready for winter to come?
Yes.

What's your favorite kind of candy?
It depends.

Do you swear a lot?
Unfortunately.

What does most of your money go toward?
Gas.

Are you hungry?
No.

Have you ever seen a dead body?
At funerals.

How long do you think you will live?
Not much longer.

What was the first thing you did this morning?
Put in my contacts.

Does anything hurt on you right now?
Back pain.

What would you do if someone told you a joke that you don't think is funny?

I have a horrible sense of humor.
You don't make me laugh.

What would you do if your new shoes felt fine in the store but now they are hurting?

This happens to me a lot actually. You have to break them in. For the most part, it isn't heels that do this to me. It's those sneaky flats that look comfortable but hurt like a bitch. How do you girls walk in those? I have a high arch in my foot. Those shoes don't do me any justice. I have to be taller than I really am.

Okay, enough rambling.
I have to go finish my drawing homework.
I'm so proud of the eye I drew!

What would you do if someone said you did something wrong and you didn't?

I would take them to court.

I've been so sick this past week and I've convinced myself I'm dying. I swear I'm the biggest Hypochondriac. I can't help it though, my mom made me this way. I'm always rubbing hand sanitizer all over me. The thought of other people's germs grosses me out. Hopefully I will be going to this specialist to have my throat, nose, and ears looked at. Then from there I'm going to try and get my tonsils out. Everyone talks about how painful of a procedure it is. It kind of makes me nervous because I've never really had anything major done. I guess they do it with lasers now. I'm also going to have my nose looked at. I suppose they will take an x-ray and see how my nose healed from the break. I've got my fingers crossed that it's not to bad. I really don't want to have to get a nose job or something crazy in the future. I'm going to end this here since I can't breath and I have to wake up early. Goodnight,Loves.

No Need For A Title.

My whole life I've been so different from everyone else.
Something that I'd never really been able put my finger on until a couple of years ago.
I don't feel the need to justify any of that on here.

So, when I was fourteen years old, I met someone. That someone eventually changed my life completely. They introduced me to so many things and opened my mind to so many thoughts and feelings I've never had. Once I thought I had figured everything out, for the most part, he talked to me about the laws of attraction. That changed everything. If you don't know much about it, look it up. It's too complicated for me to explain here. I am really into it and a true believer.

I always have this crazy thoughts about the soul/spirit/energy. I believe that your body is nothing but a home for the time being, that you choose to be here. So, if your energy has always existed, other energies have probably always been around you. I wasn't sure if I believed in soul mates a couple of years ago. I am a firm believer now. Have you ever met someone and you just click right away? It's kind of like that except more complex.

When I was fourteen years old, I met my soul mate for the first time. I didn't know it at the time and it wasn't apparent until we were together months later. Although we had this crazy connection, I hadn't opened myself up to that kind of energy yet. That first time I met him, I remember this vibe I got from him. I can't describe it. Honestly, he was so kind and he made such an impression on me. I remember being so happy to be around him, but after I went home, I experienced a feeling I have never felt ever. Empty. My whole life up until then was so weird. I could never figure out why certain things happened to me. I had lived up until that point believing I was whole. This person just waltzed into my life and suddenly this piece of me I wasn't aware was missing, was gone.

We've become very close since we've met. Although there is distance between us, we find time and ways to see each other.

Now, you're probably wondering, "If you're soul mates, why aren't you together?"
It's complicated.
He has a significant other.
When I picture my life, and the future, I always see us together.
When I think about getting married and having kids, it's him.
At least I used to.
I know this is a person I have been with in past lives.
I would love to be with them like that.
It's the best feeling in the universe to be with him.
I love his voice.
I love being in his arms.
I love him, in a different kind of way.
It's unconditional.
No matter what I do I always will.
Which brings me to my next point.

I know very little about my past.
I just know that this specific energy has always been around me.
Although I may have been with them in past lives, I don't want to be with him in this one.
I've been thinking about this so much lately.
It's really hard to even type this.
I can't find the right words.
But here it goes.
I know that he is my soul mate, in the past, present, and future.
I cannot change that and I'm completely okay with that.
I feel that people live their whole lives not ever meeting their soul mates.
I'm happy to just have met them.
I know we are going to be with other people and I understand that.

My point is that they're always going to be in the back of my mind, but I'm over it.

I can, have, and will be happy with other people.
It's not settling, I promise.
I choose to be with them.
They make me equally happy with all of their unique talents and charming spirits.
I can love other people.

Two months ago I was with someone I really cared about.
I started to see my future with them, not my soul mate.
It honestly freaked me out.
But, just as I was coming to terms, they let me down.
I have never been so hurt.
But I am strong and independent.
You'd think this would make me weak and run back to my soul mate, but it's made me resent them.
It's become more of a burden than a blessing.

I don't know where I'm going with this.
But if you read this, maybe you'll understand now.
If this is still under your favorites, give me a sign.

What would you do if you promised to feed your pet and you didn't?

That would never happen considering Scout begs for food all the time.

What a cutie, right?




I work tomorrow 12:30 till 6:30.
Someone bring me a McDonald's breakfast sandwich.




Better blog then, hopefully.
I have this crazy thought brewing.

What would you do if you were invited to two parties on the same day?

I'm never, ever invited to parties.
Sometimes when I'm at work, some of my dude friends invite me along.
I guess that contradicts my first statement.
I'm just a really awkward person.
I don't drink. I don't do drugs.
I don't know how to dance.
So, yeah.
Plus, I'm really shy.

I'm going to try and update this every day/night.
I know I've said it before, but I promise to stick with it.
I want you all inside my head.



I just started school this week.
It sucks not having anyone you care about there, or even in your classes for that matter.
But, I am so proud of everyone going out and becoming something.
I keep getting the best myspace instant messages from people.
They make me so happy.
I miss all of my friends in the class of 09, holla.



Is it too early to be thinking about what I want for Christmas?

What would you do if you dropped the cookie jar and it broke?

Haha, shit. I'd feel bad I guess. We don't have a cookie jar.
My mom used to be a weirdo and collect cookie jars. Then we had these crazy neighbors with 3 kids that were all really mean. Their parents never watched them. So, one day they came over and the youngest broke one of my mom's cookie jars. She probably shit her pants because they were super old and worth a lot of money. So, the moral of the story is, don't break my mom's cookie jars or she'll kill you.


I start school tomorrow. Joy.

cvbn

What would you do if you were at home and your homework was at school?

That would suck. I guess I would go back to school and get it.


I got the weirdest phone call the other night. It was from a number I didn't know.
It ended up being this weird dude calling to tell me that even though he had a girlfriend that I was the most amazing girl ever and that he had never felt the way he felt about me. Wtf, right?

fyvvkmxzmnbvc

You see, I thought we were a team, you and I.
I thought we were the only ones that mattered.
I hope you know I was fighting for you, not against you.
But, shit, you always have to make me the bad guy.
Whatever.
If you're not willing to fight for me, then you aren't worth a minute of my time.

Taking Back Sunday

For the past couple of years, I've listened to Taking Back Sunday. One of my young loves got me into them, and I have loved them ever since. Recently, they released a new album following up on 2006's Louder Now. Since then a lot of things have changed with the band, including the departure of guitarist of Fred Mascherino. Fred now has his own solo project, The Color Fred, and since has been replaced with Matthew Fazzi. So, when Taking Back Sunday announced the date of their appropriately titled release, New Again, I added to my list of stuff to check out. I'm huge skeptic and I'll be the first to admit my curiosity got the best of me. It seems like the long hiatus left us in the dark and suddenly they are popping up everywhere. Everyone knows that Taking Back Sunday have always been a band with a lot of baggage, and no one seems to stick around long. Then my alternative press subscription arrived with them on the cover. I read the article and was disappointed to find that the article did not focus on the band's new album, but rather frontman Adam Lazzara's drama. The article also went into Lazzara's split from his fiance, the woman he cheated with, his wife, his child, his weight gain, and his jealousy of Fred. He continued to brag about his songwriting and how it had grown so much. He basically made himself look stupid. I bought the album and quickly looked through the artwork to discover no lyrics where included, which is lame. Since Fred has left, the dynamic, split vocals are now left for Lazzara alone. This record is a little harder than past records. The lyrics are still cliche and even a little immature. They all kind of sound alike and there are no standout tracks. The album stabs at Fred and also Lazzara's ex fiance. I've tried to keep this ranting about the music, not the personal lives. It seems as Lazzara traded his melodic vocals for angry howls. It's just kind of bland. Overall, I'd give this a 2 out 5.

Have a different opinion? Let me know. I love hearing people's thoughts.

What would you do if you got a present you didn't like?

Be polite.


I love how I can predict things.
I knew you would do this to me.
I wanted to believe that you were different.
But, you just proved that you just like the rest of them.






JB,
When you told me the story about your friend dying and how it changed your life, it changed me also.
I really took that to heart.
You changed me.
You saw something in me that know one else does.
Maybe they also see it, but they don't call it out like you did.
I read that letter every single night before I go to bed.
I just want you to know that you are an amazing person.
Always stick to your guns.
Never let anyone tell you what to do or be.
You will always have a place in my heart.
TW

AWG

You are the dumbest person I have ever met.
You decide now is a good time to wear that necklace?
Is it because you're home now?
Is it because the commitment is breathing down your neck?
You're funny.
You haven't worn that necklace in so long.
It's like you said, you're a whore.
You don't care about anyone other than yourself.
I just wish things wouldn't have changed.
I wish you were still 17.
I wish you still cared about us.
I wish all of these new people weren't in the picture.
I wish things could go back to how they used to be.
You used to make me smile so much.
You don't even know.
I'm seeing you twice this summer....
Please don't let me down.
I hope you can restore my faith in you.

What would you do if the surprise party was for you but you weren't surprised?

I don't know.




It kind of scares me that you're growing up.
It seems like yesterday I met you in that parking lot.
Unwashed and unashamed.
Yet, you've come so far since then.
Part of me wants to be selfish, and never let you grow up.
I just want you to be seventeen forever.
I know you feel so much pressure right now, and I will be the first to tell you, you will survive.
You will make it.
You will overcome what feels like you need to break away, but trust me, this is where you need to be.
The grass is not always greener.
You need to stick to your guns.
ILY.

4567890

1. I don’t understand:
math.

2. I am listening to:
Head Automatica.

3. Maybe I should:
clean my room.

4. I love:
summer.

6. Your ‘ex’ and you:
1) Talk sometimes, but seldom.
2) Hate eachother.

7. I have lost my respect for:
bands who use autotune.

9. The meaning of my msn name is:
I use aim.

12. I never ever want to lose:
My puppy.
Why did this skip 10-11?

13. My Myspace is:
Dumb.

14. I get annoyed when:
people talk to me about stuff I don't care about.

15. Parties:
Stay 17?

16. Simple Kisses:


17. Today I:
am going to a party.

18. I wish:
I was in LA or COV was headed this way.

HAVE YOU

01. Ever stuck gum under a desk?
Once, but it backfired.

02. Ever kicked someone?
Yep.

03. Ever tripped over your own feet
Yep.

TODAY HAVE YOU:

01. Have you cursed?
No.

02. Have you gotten mad at someone?
Kind of.

RANDOM

Q: Is there α person who is on your mind right now?
A: Sure.

Q: Do you have any siblings?
A: No.

Q: Do you want children?
A:Sometimes, 1st born is going be name Trav.

Q: Do you smile often?
A: Yes.


Q: Do you untie your shoes every time you take them off?
A: No.

Q: Are your toenails painted?
A:Yes.

Q: Are you a friendly person?
A: No.

Q: Who’s bed other than yours do you sleep in?
A: No one's.

Q: What color shirt are you wearing?
A: Black.

Q: What were you doing at 9pm yesterday?
A: Graduation, or waiting for Alex.

Q: I can’t wait until:
A: Vacation.

ABC's

[A] - AVAILABLE?
No.

[B] - BIRTHDAY?
June 30th.

[C] - CRUSHING?
On the guy who was on MADE yesterday, hahahahaha.

[D] - DRINK YOU LAST HAD?
Dr. Pepper.

[E] - EASIEST PERSON(s) TO TALK TO?
Mel.

[F] - FAVORITE COLORS?
None.
[G] - GUMMY BEARS OR GUMMY WORMS?
Fuck Gelatin.

[H] - HOMETOWN?
Paris, France.

[I] - ILL?
No?

[K] - KILLED SOMEONE?
Your mom.

[L] LONGEST CAR RIDE?
8 hours.

[M] - MILKSHAKE FLAVOR
Banana Split.

[N] - FAVORITE NUMBER
30.

[O] - ONE WISH?
I wish I was a baller, I wish I was taller, I wish I had a girl who looked good, I would call her, wish I had a rabbit in a hat.......?

[P] - PERSON WHO CALLED YOU LAST ?
COURTNEY ANN!

[Q] - QUEER?
I lykKEee BoyZZZ

[R] - REASON TO SMILE?
SUMMER.

[S] - SONG YOU LAST HEARD?
Listening by The Used
[T] - TIME YOU WOKE UP THIS MORNING?
All.

[U] - UMBRELLA?
You can stand under mine.

[V] - VEGETABLES?
Yes please.

[W] - WORST HABIT?
Biting my nails.

[X] - X-RAYS YOU'VE HAD?
My finger.

[Y] - YOUR NUMBER OF FRIENDS ON FACEBOOK?
I get on like once a year.

[Z] - ZODIAC SIGN?
Cancer.

Empty Apartments

You and I were driving one time.
There where three other people in the car.
I remember thinking that if I were to suddenly die at that exact moment, I wouldn't be upset.
That everyone I loved was around me and that I needed no one else.
That the future didn't matter and everything was perfect.
It was then that you made the promises.
That you sang empty apartment to me.
It was then that matter.
I do not know you anymore.
In fact, every single person in that car is not in my life anymore.
I keep having dreams about you.
They always seem to revolve around what ifs and what could of beens.
It's so strange.
The thing that bothers me the most, is that I have absolutely nothing to remember you by.
All I have left is a simple photograph of you and I.
I remember someone telling me that you'll always love your first true girlfriend more than your wife.
Does that hold any substance?
I don't know.
But, what I do know is that you constantly are what I compare others to.
It's wrong.
I feel like you're going to be the person I always care about in the long run and that hurts.
I feel like maybe I'm that person for someone also, and that scares me.
I wish you could keep your promise.

What would you do if two of your best friends went to the movies without inviting you?

Shit happens.

I was just reflecting.
And I am so grateful(sp??) to be apart of this.
I am so glad to know that it's been four years.
And that JBB is the cutest boy in the whole world.
He makes me laugh sooooo hard.

I wish I could

rewind time back to today.
If only I had that extra hour.

* What would you do if only one hot dog is left and neither you nor your friend have had one?

Hahaha, I don't eat hot dogs.



are you completely over your last relationship?
Yes.

Who is the last person to send you a message on myspace?
Courtney.

Are you jealous of anyone right now?
Kind of.

What' s the connection between you and the last person to text you?
She's my friend.

Hold hands with anyone last night ?
Last night? No.

What will you be doing tomorrow?
Working, Homework.

Why did you last cry?
Because I freak myself out!

When will your next kiss take place ?
Not sure.

You have to get a facial piercing, what do you get?
Septum.

Who was the last person you talked to on the phone ?
Alex.

What color is your hair?
Medium Brown.

Do you wear glasses?
At night time.

Could you cry right now?
No.

Are you someone's best friend?
No.

How was this week?
Fucking great.

Are you someone who worries too often ?
Sometimes.

Who is the one girl you trust the most?
Not sure.

Who was the last person you took a picture with?
Vic...<3

Was yesterday better than today ?
Nope.

What plans do you have for the day?
Sleeping.

What' s the very first thing you do when you wake up?
Put in my contacts.

When's the last time you had a headache?
Not sure.

Wat woke you up this morning?
My mom.

Have you ever been awake for 2 days straight?
Nope.

Where did you go in a car last?
Courtney's Mom's work.

Who was the last person you were in a car?
Alex.

Are your nails painted?
Kind of.

Have you ever felt replaced?
I suppose.

How were you feeling last night ?
Tired.

Are you different from how you were a year ago?
No.

Are you sarcastic?
Yes.

How are you feeling?
Tired.

At this very moment, what exactly are you doing?
This...

Is someone in love with you?
I do not know.

Who are all of your texts from?
Why does it matter?

Who last did you get into a fight with?
Not sure.

Whats you're favorite thing to do on the weekend?
See my boyfriend.

Still have feelings for your ex?
No.

Lil Wayne or Plies?
Travie McCoy.

Any plans for the coming thursday?
Not yet.

What kind of music annoys you most?
Annoying kind.

Are you high?
Never.

Who was the last guy you kissed?
My boyfriend.

Do you do anything that your boyfriend/girlfriend would be mad at you if they found out?
Yep, but doesn't everyone?

When did you last eat chinese food?
No clue.

Are most of you're friends older or younger than you are?
Older.

Anyone you were good friends with, that you no longer get along with?
Yeah.

Your ex calls and tells you he hates you, you say?
"The opposite of love isn't hate-it's indifference. And if you hate me, that means you still care."

Where's you're phone at?
Not sure.

Who has hurt you the most in the past year? Do you still care for them?
A friend, and no.

Is the last person you kissed and the next person you'll kiss the same?
Yes.

Where was your default picture taken?
My house.

Do you have a YouTube account?
Yes.

Have you ever liked someone older than you?
Yeah, I've never liked anyone younger or the same age as me.

Do you have a strong relationship with your parents?
Yes.

Have you ever kissed someone named Ariel?
Nope.

Have you ever kissed someone that was high?
Not that I know of.

Have you ever been a gymnast or a cheerleader?
Both.

Ever kissed anyone 18 or older?:
26 was the oldest.

Suppose you see your bf/gf kissing another person?:
Then I would be really upset.

Has anybody on your top friends ever admitted to liking you?
Yeah.

Do you trust all your friends?
For the most part.

Dark hair or light hair in the same/opposite sex?
Dark, not a fan of blondes.

What is the best ice cream flavor?
Chunky Monkey/ chocolate chip cookie dough.

Are you good at persuading?
Mostly.

Whats your last text say and from a boy or a girl?
"I love you and courtney".
-Melanie

When is the next time you'll see the second person on your top?
I have no idea and hurts like no other.

Has anyone ever told you, you were beautiful?
Yep.

Did you believe them?
Possibly.

Would you rather hang with a bunch of girls or boys?
Boys.

Is there someone that makes you happy every time you speak with them?
Yes.

What was the last thing you hid?
Underwear.

Would you ever live with anyone on your top friends?
Yes.

Whos the last person you said "i love you to?
Brooke.

Did you mean it?
Yep.

What would you do if your jelly sandwich fell upside down on the floor?

Be mad.
Then make another.

What would you do if someone got in front of you when you were in line at the movies?

Build a bridge and get over it!

What would you do if you ordered an ice cream cone and you forgot to bring money?

Hahahahahaha, omg.
When I read this, I laughed out loud.
I guess I would bum money off of someone.
Or cry, then run away.

What would you do if you woke up in another country and no one could understand you?

Speak spanish?
I don't know.

What would you do if you saw little bugs in your salad?

Not eat it....

What would you do if Your friend had a broken leg? How would you cheer him up?

Haha, push them around in a wheelchair, obv!!!!

What would you do if you were in the middle of the lake and your boat began to leak?

But if your lightning lips aren't mine
Then I don't know the awkward stranger to my right

What would you do if You were the teacher and everyone forgot his homework?

You say I'm just fuel to the fire, and I don't deny it.
But you're the one who lit the match to begin with.
Blame Blame Blame, Blame it all on me.

What would you do if a friend borrows things from you but never returns them?

It sucks.
Be nice about it and kindly ask for them back.
If they don't return them, show up at their house and take them back.

What would you do if you did very poorly of a test?

Studyyyyyy.
Extra Credit.

What would you do if a bully bothered you on your way home?

Kicked them where it counts!!!!

Dude, I wouldn't put up with their shit.
I would just give it right back to them.


Be the bigger person?

What would happen if you found gold in your backyard?

Then I would totally mine it for money, or something.



I seriously really want dewey's pizza or noodles and company.
Yum.



Tomorrow is valentine's day.
Haha, I got flowers from two different guys today,
I'm in love.

What if everyone lived under water? Where would people live? What games would children play? What would school be like?

Haha, for some reason when I read this question, the first thing I thought of was freddie the fish.
Do you remember those games?
They were totally intense!!!


I feel like getting dressed up?

What would happen if there were no cars, buses, trains, boats, or planes? How would this change your life?

Well, that would suck.
I wouldn't be able to travel.
This is a tricky question...
Am I allowed to make my own mode of transportation?
Such as building the boat myself, or no?
I would like, get a horse or something.

What would happen if children ruled the world?

Yikes.

What would happen if you grew taller than trees? How would this change your life?

What the fuck?
I'm only 5'0.
I think it would be cool if I was like 5'8.

What would happen if you loved your neighbour as yourself? What if everyone did?

Then the world be a better place.
For example, there would be no racism, sexism, age, or sexual orientation discrimination.
World peace, you know?
But in order to achieve peace, you have to go to war.
I know it's wrong, but it's just the awful truth.




before you ask which way to go, remember where you've been

What if you could walk up walls and across ceilings?

Haha, wtf? Why do I even know about this song?

What would happen if you threw a piece of trash on the ground? What if everyone did?

That is called littering.
It is frowned upon in society.

Cool!!!

What would happen if everyone wore the same clothes?

Then life would be lame.
Seriously.
I love having clothes no one else does.
Tomorrow I'm starting my diet so I can get back in shape.
Size 2, remember me?


Anyways, All Time Low's new stuff sounds cool? They wrap up recording for the first half of the album this week. Then, they are recording with Butch Walker. By the way, the first half is produced by Matt Squire. I can almost garuntee that if you are a teenage girl, you own an album produced by the guy. Anyways, I'm not a fan, but hey, who cares? I just can't wait for june. That's when it's supposed to be released. Haha, 17. That's how old I'll be. Which is kind of ironic because the party scene/put up or shut up seems to revolve around that time frame. It's just weird to think they're only three years older than me, maybe four.
I seriously love this band, forever.
Not because of the people in, because the ep, the party scene, and put up or shut up changed my life.
I have listened to them forever!
Always Always Always Always.



Plus, Jack Barakat kind of has my heart....

Always....not!
Everyone knows TBR!
'

What would happen if you could become invisible whenever you wanted to? What are some of the things you could do that you cannot do now?

Then I would obviously spy on people.

I think it would be cool.

Whenever I get asked about super powers, I always pick being invisible. 

Seriously.

It would be fun to lurk and listen to what people have to say about you when you're not around.

I think it would also be cool to know what people are thinking and x-ray vision.

But both of those would have to have limits.

Like, they would only be cool if I could turn them on and off when I felt like it.

Take this pink ribbon off my eyes
I'm exposed
And it's no big surprise
Don't you think I know
Exactly where I stand
This world is forcing me
To hold your hand
'Cause I'm just a girl, little 'ol me
Don't let me out of your sight
I'm just a girl, all pretty and petite
So don't let me have any rights



^Because nothing is hotter than a strong, independent woman.

What would happen if animals could talk? What are some of the questions you would like to ask animals?

If animals talked, it would change everything. Everything. Everything. Everything.
In my opinion, humans have an advantage over animals because they cannot defend themselves.
By talking, I don't think a human would be able to eat them, but I don't know.
I do not support PETA, but I found this article very interesting.

I think when people see how animals are treated, it changes things.

Personally, I believe vegetarianism is something you have to chose on your own.

You cannot be forced or persuaded.

But this is not about vegetarianism.

I believe in a lot of things.

And something I feel very passionate about is punishment for the cruelness and tortures inflicted upon innocent animals.

So, anyways, read that article.

Watch the video.

Discuss.

Now, by no means am I implying anything because I do not believe in PETA.

But, what I am saying is this is a big deal.

In a huge victory for animals, a grand jury has issued 19 indictments for cruelty to animals against three former employees of Aviagen Turkeys, Inc. And it gets better—11 of the indictments are on felony charges. This marks the first time in U.S. history that factory-farm employees have faced felony cruelty-to-animals charges for abusing birds.

I just think that people really don't think about it.

I know I never did question what was on my plate until I was older and understood.

It's just a weird concept, but I guess it's human instinct.

What would happen if it really did rain cats and dogs?

Then the world would be in more shit than it already is.

I would just like to voice my opinions on the woman who gave birth to 8 kids.
First off, do not compare her to Jon and Kate, plus 8.
This lady is crazy.
I can understand not being able to have children and wanting to still pursue that.
But there is a fine line and this lady crossed it.
In my opinion, I believe you should only bring another person into this world if you are financially and emotionally stable.
I don't know why society acts like having a kid is not a big deal, because it is.
I know shit happens and people get pregnant.
That's obviously understandable.
But, is it crossing that fine line I mentioned earlier when you venture into people who know what they are getting into?
Such as in vitro fertilization?
So, this fucking crazy lady is not married and still lives with her parents.
Keep in mind she already has not one, but six other kids she birthed with the help of science.
So, she had some embryos left over from her last pregnancy, 8 to be exact, and she did not want them to be destroyed.
Being the smart person she is, she decides to have them inserted into her uterus, etc, etc, etc.
SURPRISE! All eight kids grew.
Now, for a mother, why would you put your life in danger like that?
If you have six kids already, why put yourself at risk?
And it's selfish.
She put all eight of those babies at risk.
All eight of them born premature.
Some of them can't even breath on their own.
She lives at home with her parents in a three bedroom home...
So two adults to tend to their irresponsible daughter's 14 children?
I guess the mom could help out, but then again, she's not right in the head and seems to think everything she does is perfectly fine.

Jon and Kate are honestly really inspiring.
I know people are going to say that Kate used in vitro fertilization also, and yes this is true.
But when they went into process, it was highly unlikely that all of the embryos would survive and continue the entire pregnancy.
Also, in the world right now, there are only 14 sets of living sextuplets.
So, the goslings are 1 of 14.
Plus, Jon and Kate were married.
They both had jobs.
They owned a house.
They were financially responsible.
And guess what, tlc offered them a tv and with that comes money.
In my opinion, they deserve every penny because you know why...it's not for them.
It all goes to things for those kids.

So, while we are on the subject of money, this crazy bitch is getting offers left and right. There are talks of her getting a book deal and possibly a tv show.
Don't buy into any of it.
Do not give this women one cent or even one second of your time.
She's not worth it.
Any person who has kids for fame and fortune is dumb.

So, yeah.
End rant.

What would happen if people never co-operated? Why do you think it is important to co-operate?

What?????

^^^^Go buy stuffffff. My hoodie should be here today! Yay!

I'm going to go check the mail.

What if all the streets were rivers? What would be different?

What if you didn't make up such dumb subjects??

Seriously.

I hate all time low sluts who only like alex. It's called a band, because like you know, it's a group effort. So, yeah, if you don't know who Rian Dawson is, go fall off a cliff. No one wants to do you.

Maybe its not my weekend, but I'm gonna make this year.

Just wait. June/July.

What if cows gave root beer instead of milk?

I still wouldn't drink it. Utters gross me out along with the cruel treatment of dairy cows. If you honestly think about it, there is some nasty stuff in there, such as pus, blood, etc. Yum. Plus, cows  do not produce milk all the time, only when they are prego or have a calf. So, that means cows have to be pregnant all year round to produce milk, not for their calfs who are so cute, but for humans. I don't know. I'm weird. 

give me your worst words and I'll bring the sticks and stones,
I'd hate to use them,
you can't shake it with broken bones...

What would happen if everyone lived in space?

What type of houses would they live in? What type of clothing would they wear? What type of food would they eat? How would they travel?

What would happen if there were no television? Why would this be good? bad?

Well, it would be awesome if we didn't have tv.
It is corrupt and fucked up.
Seriously.
Example=Rock of Love.

What would happen if you could fly whenever you wanted? When would you use this ability?

Well, you see, my father is a pilot.
In other words, free traveling.
So, I tend to go places when I feel like it.
I guess.
I spontaneously went to Milwaukee twice last year.
Skipped school and all that shit.
Sometimes, you do crazy things.
But, I earned so much out of it.

Wtf?
Something is going on downstairs.
I better go investigate.

What is your favourite month? Why?

I like June.
It's like the middle of summer.
My birthday is in june.
Warped tour starts in june.
I go to LA in june, mostly.
June is a good month overall.
Hi.


All Time Low on this fall out boy tour, what's up with that?
Weird.

What is your favourite day of the week?

My favorite day of the week is Wednesday.
It's the middle of the week.
My mom cooks dinner and my sister comes over.
Then, we watch the batchelor.
I'm not sure if spell check is on.
I'm tired.
I'm going to sleep.

What is your favourite holiday? What makes this holiday special?

Holiday?
Hm, I love Christmas, Halloween, and my Birthday.
But, my all time favorite holiday is Warped Tour!
Haha, seriously.


I swear someone is trying to open my back door.
EAK!

What is the best advice you ever received?

Never let anyone tell you can't do something.

Everything I honestly know about life, I learned from the weirdest person.

""Unfortunately we live in a time where "fame" and looks, money and power are all glorified and for decades we have been trained as a society to look at these famous people, these "gorgeous" human beings, and covet everything about what we see with the eyes we have...the thing is, that's what orginizations want, they want you to obsess over the way these people look and to buy in to everything that goes around trying to become the thing you obsess over, and worse its just another thing to make us feel seperate from one another. Really we are just tiny tiny organisms squirming about on this rather small planet..so I say to people who hate the way they look, as I was born with a rather large nose..focus on inner qualities and inner strengths, in yourself and in others..dont buy in to the trends and all the glam, people are more likely to like someone who is glowing rather than someone who is trying and obsessed with others think about their constatnt move. chin up and keep your focus on positive things thats why focusing on your inner strengths and finding your niche in life is the most important. ""

The only man I've ever needed in my life.^

Anyways, No Doubt announced that they will be touring this summer!

I'm so excited!

I cannot wait to see Gwen!

What is something that really makes you angry?

Homophobic people.
They are ignorant.
Don't throw around the word "faggot."

Only in America, we can have a black president, which I have absolutely no problem with, but we can't have gay marriage.

If you have a problem with gay marriage because of your religion, it's called separation of church and state.
I'm pretty sure America was founded on this very idea.

I don't feel like writing my lifelong opinions on gay rights.
But I'll tell you, gay men are the best thing ever invented.
Bros before hoes.

http://www.bidstrup.com/marriage.htm

Wow.

Children are our future?
If this is the future, I don't want to be part of it.
Runaway with me.
We can be gypsies and travel through Europe while wearing the hottest fashions.

There's only two types of people in the world

The ones that entertain, and the ones that observe
Well baby I'm a put-on-a-show kinda girl
Don't like the backseat, gotta be first
I'm like the ringleader
I call the shots
I'm like a firecracker
I make it hot


Hi.
I love Britney Spears.
All Time Low start recording their new album tomorrow.
I'm excited.
JAGK comes out tomorrow also.
Sweet!

Hello;

I need this.
Hip Bones.
Happiness.
Hoodies.
White Tees.
American Apparel.
Gay Men.
Fashion Shows.
Nikon.
Siv.
FFTL.
Caffine.
Hi Bay!

What is something that really bugs you?

I have lots of pet peeves.

What is your favourite book and why?

Invisible Monsters by Chuck Palahnuik.
Chuck Palahnuik is my favorite author.
I quote his books all the time.
I like books that catch your attention and make you question things.

"…no matter how much you think you love somebody, you’ll step back when the pool of their blood edges up too close"

"Hysteria is impossible without an audience."

"When did the future switch from being a promise to being a threat?"

"Nothing of me is original. I am the combined effort of everybody I’ve ever known."

"Game shows are designed to make us feel better about the random, useless facts that are all we have left of our education."

"If I can’t be beautiful, I want to be invisible."

"Your past is just a story. And once you realize this it has no power over you. -adapted"

"All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring."

"It happens fast for some people and slow for some, accidents or gravity, but we all end up mutilated."

"It's not living alone if you keep a rifle under the bed."

"The best way is not to fight it, just go. Don't be trying all the time to fix things. What you run from only stays with you longer. When you fight something, you only make it stronger."

"The most boring thing in the entire world is nudity. The second most boring thing is honesty."

"The one you love and the one who loves you are never, ever the same person."

"The only reason why we ask other people how their weekend was is so we can tell them about our own weekend."

"When nobody will look at you, you can stare a hole in them. Picking out all the little details you'd never stare long enough to get if she'd ever just return your gaze, this, this is your revenge."

"When you don't share your problems, you resent hearing the problems of other people."

"When you understand that what you're telling is just a story. It isn't happening anymore. When you realize the story you're telling is just words, when you can just crumble it up and throw your past in the trashcan, then we'll figure out who you're going to be."

"Why is it you feel like a dope if you laugh alone, but that's usually how you end up crying?"

"You can't base your life on the past or the present. You have to tell me about your future."

"Your birth is a mistake you'll spend your whole life trying to correct."

What is something that makes you feel sad?

That I don't own these pants.
Haha, overall I'm a happy person.
I have a lot of things going for me.

What is your favourite song and why?

Haha, you know what I just noticed?
All of these words have the British spellings, like with the u.


Anyways, as far as favorite songs go, it changes constantly.
I mean there are a few top favorites.
I will always love Chelsea Hotel by Leonard Cohen.
I find that I have favorite songs by different bands.
From First To Last, as far as they go, I don't have a favorite.
Weezer-Buddy Holly, Falling For You, Perfect Situation
The Academy Is- Attention
All Time Low- The Girl's A Straight Up Hustler, Circles, Jasey Rae, Poppin', Every song by them
The Audition- Lawyers, Basically Controversy Loves Company Album
Bright Eyes-First Day Of My Life, Classic Cars, I like a lot of his stuff
BRIGHTEN- Every song. They are awesome.
The Color Fred- It Isn't Me, If I Surrender
Fall Out Boy-Everything Pre Infinity On High.
Feable Weiner- Strawberry Debutante
Foo Fighters- The Colour And Shape Album
Gym Class Heroes- Hi, this band is in my top 5 favorite bands. Too many songs to pick from.
Head Automatica-The Razor, God, Curious, Cannibal Girl
Katy Perry-Thinking Of You, If You Can Afford Me, Self-Inflicted, Fingerprints, her whole album
The Matches- E.Von Dahl Killed The Locals, Decomposer, Number one favorite band!
Mondo Primo- EastCoast Girls, Their cd is my car stero right now.
Silverstein- First Wrapped In Blood, Smile In Your Sleep, Sound Of The Sun
Something Corporate-Globes And Maps, Drunk Girl, I Woke Up In A Car
Taking Back Sunday- Everything Up Until Fred's Departure



Haha,Wow.
I'm obbsessive.
I'm Listening To Uh Oh! Eplosion right now!
They are good.
Look them up.
They are really good looking and need help getting onto warped again.
Go Vote!

What is the meaning of "He laughs best who laughs last"?

I'm not quite sure.
I think it has to do with success.

I really want to go to the library.
Or something.

So, on the news tonight, the dude explained in detail what to wear for cold weather.
I was laughing soooo hard.
Then he put on these gloves and was like, "These are lobster gloves. They keep your fingers warmer because your fingers aren't separated."

I love Katy Perry. Her lyrics are so true and her voice is awkward. Her boyfriend is cool,too.
Her cd is pretty awesome.
I find it hard to appreciate girl musicans/ bands because they can't always back their shit.
Katy writes her own lyrics/songs and plays the guitar.
Plus, I love the way she isn't about fitting into the cookie cutter shape people seem to manipulate others into becoming.
I know it's kind of hard to take her seriously when she has songs called "I kissed a girl" and "Ur so gay". But, honestly, if you sit down and actually listen to her album, she's quite complex. In my opinion, those songs just scrape the surface of what makes her so interesting. Her voice is really unique,too, because she can make it work for different styles. Also, she dresses crazy and is into vintage/thrift finds, which is my favorite. There is something about her, but she has caught my attention. I don't see that changing soon. She's awesome live. I saw her at warped tour this summer. I hope she puts out another record.
Btw, record label after label turned this girl down. I bet they are rolling over in their graves right now.

What is your most indispensable possession and why?

My photographs.
My memories.

What is something you are pessimistic about?

I'm the world's biggest pessimist.
Honestly.
I always look at the negatives before I look at the positives.
And, I seem to see the worst in people.
I'm pretty sure it's not proper grammar to start a sentence with and.
But I really don't give a fuck.
Fuck you.
Hi.
Anyways, seriously, these past two days have been like super awesome. But, I'm trying not to get in over my head. You know? I think I need to keep my guard up. I don't know.

I want a cheese quesadilla.

You know what? Postsecret.com is my all time favorite website. This week's secrets were actually good. I sent one in last week. Cool, right?
I kind of hope it doesn't get picked to be on the website though.
Too personal.

But yeah.
I'm going to go to Barnes and Noble this week, or something. I need a good book. Any suggestions?

What is something you are optimistic about?

Something I am optimistic about would have to be the future of this man.

That sounds so creepy and weird.

But, really, I just sit back and watch him, and he really knows how to get what he wants.

I've known him for about 5 years now, and he is the person I am the proudest of in my life and the one person I look up to.

I'm not saying he's never made a mistake, because he has, but he's pretty close to perfect.

I wish I had the drive and ambition that fuels him.

I see him living the dream, and it makes me wonder if I'll ever be as happy as him.

I just don't understand how things don't get him down. 

I want inside his head.

Actually, I rather meet his father.

I'm a huge pessimist.

I'm always negative.

I'm optimistic when it comes to school.

I'm optimistic about some things in life, which I don't feel compelled to write on here considering I already wrote a novel.

I met some guy from high school musical 3 today.

It was so funny.

I was dying laughing.

He blushed a lot when he was talking to me.

I've never ever seen any of the high school musicals.

I'm going to try and keep it that way.

I went and saw Yes Man with my super awesomely cute boyfriend.

Then it was really cold.

So, the most logical thing to do was to go to sonic and get slushies, right?

Alex being the cool person he is said green apple when he meant to say orange.

But yeah. So, this poem, not sure how I feel about it. Some times I read it and love it. Other times I hate it. Cool?

Manage me.

Manage me,
I am a mess,
swept under the rug of yesterday's home improvement,
a whimsical urge tossed aside for the easy reassurance of home and comfort.
I am the photograph tucked away as a book-mark,
in a book left half unread,
once reopened to find memories crawling back into peripheral sight,
faded, creased and lonely.
I long to be admired,
long to be held, torn and laughed at,
laughed with,
like a distant relative or an old friend breathing in their last breath.
I missed the moment when time collapsed and memory was erased,
replaced by finicky social experiments,
lost in the blur of intoxication,
sucked through multi-colored bendy-straws,
making way for a spinning world where hub-caps stood still,
but our vision didn't.
If I could leave you with only one thing,
it would be small, foldable, and made from trees,
with a few careless words,
scribbled in blue;

Take a minute to learn me,
take a moment to love me,
because I need your love to live,
and without it,
I am nothing.

What is the best way to treat meddlesome people?

meddlesome

adjective

intrusive in a meddling or offensive manner; "an interfering old woman"; "bustling about self-importantly making an officious nuisance of himself"; "busy about other people's business" [syn: interfering] Well,I think everyone has a little bit of curiosity in them. Isn't human nature to want to know things? Probably. I think some people take things too far. Such as assuming things or even making up things about others. I don't know. I don't pick the subjects for these. It's been said again and again; life is a process, we are fleeting moments that come and go, and I’m grateful to have my time, my aspirations and my mistakes, my flaws and my abilities, think of me what you will, but before you do, don’t. Goodnight.

What is your idea of a dull evening?

Dull evening?
Probably lurking myspace.

So, I just watched Donnie Darko.
But, I didn't get to see the last 20-30 minutes.
It's weird.



1) Are you really ready for 107 questions?
Nope.


2) Was your last relationship a mistake?
No regrets. I wouldn't be how I am now. Fate is mysterious.


3) Do you believe in God?

Yes.

4) Who is the last person you hugged?
Alex, I think?


5) When was the last time you drank Coca Cola?
Not sure.


6) Have you ever been depressed?
Sure.


7) Have a best friend?
No.

8) Are you a boy or girl?
None. I'm a robot.


9) What is your relationship status?

I have a boyfriend named Alex. He's probably cuter than your boyfriend. Sorry?

10) How do you want to die?
I want to go out with a bang. Unexpected, unusual, and tragically.


1) What did you last eat?
Cheese on crackers with my mom.


12) Have you ever been suspended?

I've never even had detention.

13) Are you currently listening to your MySpace song?
No.


14) When was your last non-physical fight?
I don't get in fights.


15) Do you have an attitude?
Sadly, yes.


16) Ever been in love?
In a completely different way. I still am.


17) What is your real name?
Taylor, but you can call me Quinn. It's more fitting.

18) When was the last time you kissed someone?
9:50pm.


19) Name someone you know whose name starts with the letter D?
Derek.

20) Do you hate anyone at the moment?
No.


21) Do you miss someone?
Trav.

22) Twirl or cut your spaghetti?
I put it in the blender and drink it like a real man does.

23) Do you tan a lot?
I'm classy.


24) Have any pets?
None.

25) How exactly are you feeling?

Nervous.

26) Ever eaten food in a car while someone or yourself is driving?
Ever jumped off a bridge?No? You should.

27) Ever made out in the bathroom?
Yep.


28)Would you take any of your exes back?
It's just not that easy, so no. Never.


29) Are you scared of spiders?
The future freaks me out.


30) Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?
Hahaha, no.


31) Do you regret anything in your past?
Fate, Fate, Fate.


32) What are your plans for this weekend?
Hang out with my boyfriend.


33) Do you want to have kids?
Maybe.


34) Ever kissed somebody whose name starts with an M?
No.


35) Do you type fast?
I suppose.


36) Do you have piercings?
Yes.


37) Want any more?
Septum.


38) Can you spell well?
I got second place in the 8th grade spelling bee.


39) Do you miss anyone from your past?
No.


40) What are you craving right now?
Nothing.


41) Ever been to a bonfire?
Yeah.


42) Do you like swimming?
No.


43) Have you ever been on a horse?
I think. I'm afraid of them.

44) Ever kissed someone in a pick up truck???
No. I'm classy.


45) Have you ever broken someone's heart?
Once or twice.


46) Have you ever been cheated on?
Not to my knowledge.


47) Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?
Cry? I don't know. I've made people upset in the past.


48) How long have you and your boyfriend/girlfriend been dating?
18 days.


49) Would you live with someone without marrying them?
Yeah.


50) What should you be doing?
Sleeping.


51) What's irritating you right now?
Driving test.


52) Have you ever liked someone so much that it hurts?
No. I liked someone so much I skipped school twice to go see them in Wisconsin.

53) Does somebody love you?
My mom.

54) What is your favorite color?
At the moment, yellow.


55) Have you ever changed clothes in a vehicle?
In a limo once.


56) Are you black or white?
Macadamia Caucasian.

57) Do you have trust issues?
Somewhat.


58) When's the last time you ate fast food?
Whoa, last year.


59) Have you ever shaved in the kitchen sink?
No?


60) Do you have a good relationship with your parents?
Yes.


61) Did you want Barack Obama for president?
Ron Paul,ftw.


62) Do you believe your most recent ex thinks about you?
Well, we've been broken up for a long time, but he does.


63) Who was the last person you cried in front of?
My mom.


64) Do you give out second chances too easily?
No.


65) Is it easier to forgive or forget?
No. I hold grudges.


66) Is this year the best year of your life?
Yes.


67) What was your childhood nickname?
Idk.

68) who was the last person you called?
Alex.

69) Do you think you're a good person?
No.


70) Do you believe that everything happens for a reason?
Yeah. Fate and Karma.


71) What's the last thing you did before you went to bed last night?
Looked up monologues.


72) Is there anyone you wish was still in your life?
No. I like to keep them where they belong, the past.


73) What is bothering you?
Driving test. Play audition.


74) Have you ever been out of state?
Yeah.


75) What's your favorite place you've been to?
LA. What's up?


76) Are you listening to music right now?
No. You already asked me this.


77)Do you like chinese food?
Some.


78) Do you know your father's birthday?
June 25th.

79) Are you afraid of the dark?
To a certain extent.


80) Is cheating ever okay?
No.


81) Are you mean?
Yeah.


82) Can you keep white shoes clean?
I try, but fail.


83) Have you noticed this survey stopped getting personal?
Sure?


84) Do you believe in true love?
I believe in soulmates.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Soulmate
Read Plato's theory.

85) Are you proud of the person you've become?
Somewhat.


86) Do you like kids?
No.


87) How many do you want?
Undecided.

88) Do you like the outside?
Yeah.


89) Are you currently bored?
No.

90) Do you want to get married?
Maybe.


91) Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby?
No.


92) Are you hungry?
Yeah.


93) Do you have a bank account?
2.


94) What makes you happy?
The Color of Violence.

95) Would you change your name?
Yes, to Quinn.

96) Ever been to Alaska?
No.

97) Is there a chance of a new tattoo or piercing soon?
No.


98) Do you watch the news?
Sometimes.

99) What' s your zodiac sign?
Cancer.

100) Do you like Subway?
Yeah.

101) Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed?
Nope.

102) Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?
Laugh, not possible.


103) Do you talk like your friends?
No.


104) Is it annoying?
Your mom is annoying.

105) Have you ever seen someone you knew and purposely avoided them?
Always.

106) Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete
???

107) Who is the last guy/girl you talked to?
Boy; Alex.

Girl; Mom.

What is your favourite time of day?

Well, honestly, it depends on the day of the week and stuff.
If it is a week day, then after school.
Weekends,I'm nocturnal.

I really need to get a new, cuter purse.

I'm really sad right now.
I don't know why.
Probably the weather.


I eat a lot of peanut butter and jellies as of lately.
It's kind of annoying.

My sister is coming over and we are watching the bachelor tonight.
That one guy is on there.
He's cool.^^^^
That show is really corny and annoying.
But I always get sucked in.
Booooo!

What is the worst thing parents can do to their children?

Kill them, haha.
I'm sorry.
That wasn't nice.

So yeah.
I'm retaking my driving test tomorrow.
I'm excited.
Actually, I'm really nervous.

I need to work on my project for photography.
It's due next Tuesday but I just want to get it finished.


I just got home from work.
So, I think I'm going to get a peanut butter and jelly.
Then, I'm going to bed.



The playlist for punk goes pop is like debuting tomorrow.
I can't wait.

What is a good neighbour?

State Farm.

Haha, shit, I don't know.

Today was my first day back from winter break and it was brutal.

I hate waking up early.

Why do journals always have to have corny titles?

I think they are called prompts.

I'm on the phone with my boyfriend right now.

He's talking about his best friend's grandma.

Anyways, I was looking through my photobucket account and found this...<

I'm pretty sure I drew it in like 7th grade, maybe eighth. No point, other than it shows my dedication. I actually have the original hanging up in my room. I'd like to think it looks just like Jack.

I was driving today and my wheel got scratched up.

Then I felt like I was going to throw up.

First time ever hitting the curb.

This journal/blog is obnoxiously long.

Bye!